New Ambitions

So recently I was talking to a co-worker of mine who I would describe as ambitious, both in his job and in his pursuit of contentment/ease of life. That got me thinking about ambition and about how I really don't have it in my job/career. I may have at one time but not so much anymore. There are a few reasons for this, some of which support the idea that lack of ambition is not so bad.

Reason #1: I landed the job of my dreams on first try. I really have enjoyed my job these past four years and it fits perfectly the description of my ideal job "to do research to help policy makers make better decisions." Not that they have made the better decisions a majority of the time but I'm "fighting the good fight."

Reason #2: I'm not really a "career is my life" person. I've never be soley focused on school or a job so much that it was my life. In high school and college, I was the queen of extra-circular activities. In grad school, while I felt like school was my life, my collegues often remarked at the number of people I knew "outside the department." My friend Jen and I often talk about the benefits of a balanced life so I'd consider reason #2 (as well as #1) a positive reason for not being ambitious.

Reason #3: Laziness. No squeezing a positive out of this one. I want the easy life. I don't want to have to think hard. I don't want to have to dream bigger dreams because it takes work to acheive them. That leads me to....

Reason #4: Lack of Vision. I'm a problem-solver. I like to take things that already exist and make them better. But that's still no excuse for not having vision. Because sometimes to solve a problem the system/structure doesn not exist and the problem-solver then needs to start from the beginning.

So I guess if I started out with the question, "should I be more ambitious?" then my above analysis has led me to the conclusion "not necessarily, but I do need to fight laziness and be more visionary."

Hitting the 1 year of marriage mark and with the 30 years of life milestone quickly approaching, I've been thinking more about what's next? (Okay, who ever stops thinking about what's next?) Kids is specifically what I'm thinking about. Timing is another issue but I've narrowed it down to a year and a half period of when I would like the first one to arrive (Jan 07-Jul08, leaning more towards the Jul08 end of the range). I want to stay home with my kids, at least for the majority of the week, which means I can't continue in my current job.

So what does that mean for now? Well, I'm thinking I need to be a little visionary and think about new career that I can do part time. Originally the plan was to go back to school for another Masters during the stay at home mom years, but I'm not sure I want to do that now, which again may just be a lack of ambition (i.e. laziness). Recently, I've been thinking about a change that would lead me to helping people more on a one-on-one basis. I'm thinking of financial education or budget/credit counceling, the second of these would require me to get some more training, which I am willing to do.

My "mission" if you can call it that, when I started working was to help my co-workers. Given my little experience in the financial services industry, that meant offering a fresh perspective, helping with computer assistance, and just generally being available and willing and cheerful to help with the work of the office. Now that I have that experience, my role has turned a little more towards helping my boss mainly and helping to mentor younger co-workers. This is the part that will be hard to leave. But this "mission" gives and interesting insight (may be an inheritantly typical female thing) into my view of my job. I was more concerned about helping those around me than being successful at what I "produce." I definitely strive to do good work but not sure that's where my heart is. Furthermore, I really enjoy helping people who write to the Tresury with questions and feel they have no where else to turn. So that's why I think financial education would be a good match.

I've looking into the organizations out there already but nothing seems like a good match yet. I want to teach a program that will be free to participants and will just be basic financial skills. Like how to open a bank account, what's a good rate on a credit card, etc. And using the internet to show folks different resources available.

I still have time so I will keep looking. May be a little more ambition wouldn't hurt.

Anniversary Weekend

Love is not a feeling, it's a behavior.

That's the quote on my calendar this month. Quite appropriate for the month of my husband's and my first year anniversary. Besides learning the correct grammar for expressing the 1st person plural, one year of marriage has taught be how true the above quote is. That being said, we've had it pretty easy. Sure marriage is work but its joyful work when the person you're married to is as kind, understanding, sweet, and focused on the larger picture of our love even during the occasional squabbles as my husband. The work this year has been mostly in dividing household chores and being intentional about romance and our relationship when those chores and obligations mount up.

So the plans for the weekend include spending a night at the hotel we stayed at on our wedding night, going out to dinner, toasting with the flouts we used on our wedding day (we'll actually use alcohol this time!), eating the one piece of cake we saved from our wedding cake, watching our wedding video, recounting memories from the wedding and honeymoon, re-reading the questionaires we filled out during our marriage counseling, buying ourselves an anniversary present (breakfast nook!), and opening cards from family members.