Kayla at 3 months

By two months Kayla was only getting up once or twice a night and going back down pretty quickly.  She is a great nighttime sleeper.  The first two months were rough as with any baby but by Memorial Day, I was starting to function like a normal human being.  We still have her in the back-n-play in our room. 

Some memories from that fog of the early days are that Kayla was famous for peeing as soon as we took her diaper off.  Lots of laundry and wipes early on.

Kayla weighed 10lbs 6 oz at her two month appointment which put her in the 50th percentile and was 23 and a 1/4 inches long which put her in the 90th percentile.  I think the length measurement might have been off though.

We received a lot of new 0-3 clothes and a bunch of really pretty 3-6 months summer hand-me-down.  So we have been set on clothes.

Kayla has liked sitting in the bouncy seat that we keep in the kitchen.  We put her on the floor sometimes but not as often as we did with our other kids since she could easily get stepped on.

Kayla took her first big trip to Uncle Justin's wedding yesterday.  (The 3 month pictures were taken on the bed at the hotel in PA.  We forgot the flamingo.)  She is a great traveler. 

Kayla nurses like a champ.  I think she spits up more than any of the other kids did though.  At least more in terms of quantity of spit up each time.  I have to hurry up and get the burb cloth under her mouth before just has a chance to burb because when she does, a lot comes out.  I remember this one mom at church (who had a baby right before Levi was born) holding the burb cloth under her baby's mouth while he was on her lap and I thought that was so weird until I ended up with a baby that spits ounces at a time and now I understand why!

Kayla seems to like it when we sing and she often tries to talk and sing herself!

Kayla's Baptism

 The grandparents picture.  So blessed that each of our kids has a picture of them at their baptism with all four of their grandparents.  It was my dad's turn to hold the baby!

Our friend Bill Fullilove baptized Kayla on Mothers' Day - May 14th.

Her face was all scratched up from her fingernails, she pooped on her dress minutes before the baptism (don't tell Bill!), and she was exhausted so these aren't the greatest pictures but hey it was a miracle we all made it through this crazy weekend of a 50th anniversary party for Martin's parents and a baptism and baptism party at our house, all of which we planned in our sleep-deprived state of having a newborn.  This next picture is so appropriate then.  We did it!
 

Kayla's birth story

As Kayla's due date was approaching and we looked at all the things still on our calendar, we thought watch her be born on April 2nd because we have soo many things going on that day.  Well, it may have been BECAUSE I tried to do so many things that day that she was born that night.

It was a Sunday – so it began with church.  We attended worship and Sunday School as normal and returned home for lunch.  Martin took Dylan and Levi to Dylan’s Cub Scout den meeting – a visit to a nature center along with a hike.  I took Lydia to her choir performance at the nursing home.  I was thinking it was good that I saw this performance because I might miss the performance at the church the next Saturday.  I usually dread going to that performance because I'm often wrangling younger children but I really got to enjoy it this time.  I remember thinking I should sit down as much as I could.  The parking situation at the nursing home isn't that great so I made sure we got a ride with some friends so that I wouldn't have to walk far to the car.  Nathan and Christine Chi brought Lydia and I home, but shortly after that I went back to church for the BOW training that I was doing that afternoon.  I had someone lined up to do it in case I couldn't but I was really hoping that I could make it.  Knowing what I crazy day I had been having, I made sure to put my feet up as much as I could at the meeting.

Meanwhile, Martin took the three children to Dylan’s makeup baseball game.  Since I hadn't eaten dinner yet, I stayed at church after the training for the missions dinner and then headed straight to Dylan's game.  I got there in time to see Dylan’s amazing pitching and his walk off hit that propelled his team to victory.  Martin took the other kids home and I stayed till the end with Dylan.  The time stamp on one of the pictures I took at the game said 9:05pm so it was probably 9:30 before we were home and Dylan was in bed.  I went downstairs and watched Netflix with Martin for a little while and then decided to go up to bed around 10pm.  I went to the bathroom and it was then that I lost the mucus plug and knew it was time for labor to start.  However, we didn't realize it really was time for the baby to come.  I called my parents because I wanted to catch them before they went to bed to tell them things were progressing.  I didn't tell them to come immediately because I had no idea how long labor would be.  I left it up to them to decide if they wanted to drive now or in the morning.  They of course came immediately knowing they couldn't sleep anyway and good thing they did.

After getting off the phone with them, I started doing all the things that I HAD to do before baby came that I hadn't finished - packing my bag for the hospital and cleaning the spare bed room and getting the bed ready for my parents to come.  After that my water broke and we knew it REALLY was time.  We called the doctor and our friend and neighbor Katie Cubba, who had repeatedly asked us to be the one we call in the middle of the night to watch the kids if the baby was coming until my parents arrived.  Contractions had started by the time we were giving instructions to Katie.  By 10:45 we were on our way to the hospital.  In the car, we noticed the contractions were coming fast – every three minutes.

At the ER registration desk, we happen upon this very young male receptionist who persisted in all the required paperwork that you have to sign about not being blind or needing special accommodations while I'm hunched over the desk writhing in pain.  Finally, a mature woman comes out from the back office and says "I think she'll be more comfortable doing this upstairs," and then gets me wheelchair and off we go to Labor & Delivery.  The nurses and my midwife figured out pretty quickly that this baby was coming quick.  There was no triage necessary – we were immediately assigned to delivery room 2 and I remember my midwife standing there waiting for me to get undressed so she could check how far dilated I was.  It was about 11:20pm.  I remember looking at the clock because I knew it was close to midnight and I thought oh, her birthday will be the 3rd because surely it will take longer than 40 minutes.  There wasn't even a question about an epidural - "oh honey, this will be over so fast, you won't need one."  I remember them trying to get some information into the computer so they could start ordering things like bloodwork and oh, the baby's needs.  My midwife asked, can you wait to push through one more contraction so we can draw your blood.  Okay, one more contraction, I can do that.  They got my blood and then the next contraction I was pushing.  Kayla was out after only a couple pushes.  The time was 11:39pm, April 2nd.  1139 is Dylan's cub scout pack number and Martin was wearing his cub scout pack shirt so we will always remember that time.  I couldn't believe it was only 19 minutes after we got into the room and that she was born before midnight.  Kayla weighed 7 lbs 1 oz (bigger than Dylan and Lydia, but smaller than Levi).  I had to push again after she was born to deliver the placenta (first time I had to do that).  It wasn’t until after she was born that we completed the check-in for the hospital.  We took some pictures and had a few quiet moments with Kayla, who just wanted to sleep.  Without the epidural, I was able to get moved to the recovery room fairly quickly.  But I also had more pain to deal with.  Or maybe it's just because I'm older.  I took the stronger stuff for much longer than I had to with other deliveries. 

In the morning, my parents brought Levi to meet his new sister.  Levi was very uncertain and timid in approaching her.  But he really wanted her to have the balloon he brought her and kept trying to get her to take it.  Dylan and Lydia came after school and were very eager to meet her.  They all wanted to hold her and kept wanting to take turns.  We had a few more visitors, got a special Nats/Inova gift from the hospital (blanket and hat), and came home on Tuesday after one more night at the hospital.

Name and verse stories

Kayla is actually the name we had picked out for Joshua had he been a girl.  It's a derivative of a name that means "Who is like you, God?" meaning who can even try to compare to God in goodness, wisdom, power, etc.  We chose that name originally because we knew that we could not fathom God’s purposes with Joshua’s problems and his untimely death.  But the name has taken on new meaning as we consider that no one is like our God who restores us from our grief and has blessed us with two wonderful children after losing Joshua. Plus, we still liked the name and wanted to use it (it has some of my favorite letters - K, L, Y, A!) but changed the middle name we had picked out to Elizabeth in honor of my grandma and in particular my mom (Betty).  According to Martin, "Betty possesses a character and a heart of compassion and service that we aspire for Kayla to have.  Betty has been a constant source of help and encouragement to our family.  Whenever she visits, she labors in love tirelessly on an endless list of household chores as well as give each of our children time and attention so that they know that they are loved and cherished.  Betty has been present to rejoice with us in the good and she has wept with us through the bad.  Kayla’s name will remind her of the love and devotion of her grandmother and the example she has in what it means to be a godly woman." 

It was mid-March and we still didn't have a verse that stuck out to us.  I was in the car one Friday for almost two hours picking up Dylan's two friends and taking them to a party at another kid's house and this was the verse of the day on the Christian radio station.  They read it every half hour or so so I heard it about 5 times while I was in the car that day.  It's meaningful for Kayla because in so many ways she is much more than we imagined (her very being since she was a surprise as well as her reddish hair).

More than we ever imagined

But, as it is written, “What no eye has seen, nor ear heard, nor the heart of man imagined, what God has prepared for those who love him”

- I Corinthians 2:9

After a very brief labor, Kayla Elizabeth Etner was born at 11:39pm on Sunday, April 2nd, 2017.  She weighed 7lbs, 1oz and was 19.75 inches long. We, along with Kayla’s big brothers and sister, are marveling at what God has given us.

38 Week Update

Everything continues to look good with my weekly non-stress tests and it's fun getting to "see" her every week.  I've been able to find a sitter each week.  And last week was totally providential.  They couldn't fit me in for my normal Tuesday appointment so I had to come in on Monday.  Was able to get a sitter through my babysitting coop and then it turns out that we had a big snow storm on Tuesday so I would have had to reschedule if I would have been scheduled for Tuesday. 

Sorry no picture this week.  Just imagine huge.  I haven't weighed this much in my entire life.  I'm about 15 lbs heavier than I was with Levi. 

Haven't been making it to Jazzercise this month.  Between cancellations and then on the one night I can go I just felt horrible and couldn't make it, it has been tough to get my last month's worth in. 

So we got through my parents returning from Florida, Dylan's piano competition, and my BOW meeting.  I have my last MOPS leadership meeting this week, a playdate for Levi, a women's breakfast on Saturday, and a BOW training on Sunday that I'm still hoping to make it to before baby so we'll see.  Still haven't been able to get caught with work.

We moved our bed and put the pack n' play in our room.  (We will wait until after the baby comes to move Levi and Lydia around.)  Started a bag for the hospital.  Working on getting the email list for the birth announcement email.  We are getting close!  Always so hard not knowing when the baby will come.  I'm trying to schedule a massage but I don't want to do it before the 7th because I don't want to make the baby come before then.

36 week update

This picture was taken 2 weeks ago, a couple days after I got my haircut and on the night Martin and I were going out for a sort of combined late Valentine's Day date and babymoon.   We couldn't get a babysitter any closer to Valentine's Day and our babymoon sitters are still snowbirding in FL (baby can't come until next week when they get back!) so we just went out to dinner and to a movie.  I can't remember the last time we did both in one night/date so it was a treat.  And I got to wear the free dress I got from a friend who was shipped a maternity dress by mistake.  I think I look so huge in this picture but I guess it's because it's a dress and it hangs over my belly.  Anyway, it's a 34 week picture but a 36 week update.

When I had my 32-33 week checkup, the nurse told me to come back in 3 weeks and the midwife said 2 so they scheduled me for 2 weeks.  They scheduled me for the "non-stress" tests but it wasn't clear if we were actually going to start those yet or even at all - they were supposed to get back to me.  Remember, the perinatologist had said all issues from the sonogram had been clear but because of my age he recommended the non-stress tests at 35 weeks on.  But my doctors don't do the non-stress tests that early just for age.  The day before the appointment, I still hadn't lined up a sitter because I wasn't sure if they wanted me to do the tests so I tried to cancel the appointments but they wouldn't let me.  I guess they determined that even though things were clear, because of my history they wanted to take the extra precaution.  I think they didn't want to go against the perinatologist's recommendation and just wanted to be extra careful because we could (insurance-wise).  At first I thought I could just have this first one and then wait a few weeks but the mid-wife said that since we started we should continue each week.  I was kinda annoyed at first (these appointments would be 1.5 hour appointments each week) so I will have to find a sitter for each one and they are kinda long and boring (at least the part where I sit on the monitor, not the ultrasound part.)  But I had the first one on Tuesday and it was actually kinda nice to sit and read my book club book on my kindle and have some quiet rest time and then have the ultrasound.  It's just going to be a challenge finding someone to watch Levi every week.  This week someone at school happened to just volunteer when I said I needed someone.  So that was awesome. 

My OB moved their office since my last check up too.  They actually moved into the office that the perinatologist was in when we went to see him for the second opinion with Joshua.  So I had the sonogram on Tuesday in pretty much the same room I had that sonogram of Joshua. 

Dylan has now started baseball and things are starting to get crazier with our schedule.  I've been hoping to work ahead a little for work but that hasn't happened yet.  Hopefully I have a few more weeks.  Signed Levi up for preschool!  Now starts the "okay, if we can get through this, the baby can come."  I'm hoping for the 7th but then I will probably miss Lydia's choir concert. 

I just realized I never posted about my due date.  Original due date was April 8th.  An early sonogram led them to push the due date up to April 3rd although I am sticking with the 8th in my mind (this is why I'm not sure which week appointment I am on and I don't think my doctors know either.)  I want the baby to be born AFTER Martin's 40th birthday on April 5th so that the baby's birth certificate won't have me listed as being 40 and Martin as 39.  (You may recall that burned me up that Dylan's birth certificate has mom's age 30 and dad's age 29.  And here we go again!).  But I'm also sick of being pregnant so it's hard to say I want to go longer. 

33 week update

We are well into the 3rd trimester now and less than two months to go.  Lots to update.  So the second sonogram that I had in December showed that the Choroid Plexus Cysts had "resolved themselves" or disappeared.  The radiologist still thought the baby's stomach looked large so after some back and forth with my doctor, they decided to have us go see a perinatologist.  No one sounded too concerned (if there was a blockage of some sort, the fluid levels around the baby would be lower than normal and they weren't).  Yet, they still recommended the further testing.  The perinatologist happens to be the same doctor that gave us the second opinion when we got Joshua's initial trisomy 18 diagnosis.  I think my mind just blocked out the fear and I told myself to not worry until we had something to worry about.  On January 4th we went to the appointment and the sonographer and the doctor said the baby's stomach was on the larger end of the normal range but still normal and nothing to be concerned about especially since the fluid levels around the baby were still fine.  The perinatologist did recommend however that I have weekly baby heart rate checks and another sonogram at 35 weeks because of my "advanced maternal age."  Not sure what my doctors (who see lots of Catholic (and otherwise) women having babies well into their 40s) will want to do with that.  But basically the issues from the 20 week sonogram have all been resolved and there's no out of the ordinary concern with the baby.  And I passed the glucose test.

Our trip to PA and FL went well - no milk spills or throwing up in the car and the ride from FL to home on the 31st was really quick.  The drive from PA to FL on the 26th was longer than expected due to traffic since lots of folks were traveling that day.  My ankles swelled up a lot and then kept swelling up most every night we were in FL (but the swelling would go down while I slept).  We had a great time visiting, celebrating Christmas in PA, and going to the beach and alligator farm in FL.  Our van was so packed we had to leave some gifts and things in PA so we'd have room to bring everything home from FL.  When my parents come when the baby's born we'll have those boxes to open again!

People keep giving us stuff - both our stuff back and other stuff.  Got our Bumbo seat back, some of our girl clothes from a friend and some from a neighbor, and I found someone who is going to let us borrow the stroller frame I was going to try to get from Craig's list.

Still going to Jazzercise (and now everyone can tell that I'm pregnant) but it's still so infrequent with the kids' activities and cancellations.  Then one night I got locked out of the car temporarily (key fob didn't work and it took us too long to figure out there was a key in the fob) so missed going.  I will cancel my membership but I hope I can keep going until the end of March because it does make my hips feel better.

Speaking of feeling better, I'm FINALLY getting my haircut this week.  It's been almost 9 months and I need it shorter so I don't have to spend so much time on it with the baby coming.

It's still hard to believe we are having another baby but I rarely forget I'm pregnant now because I feel big and have all those fun pregnancy symptoms like sciatic nerve pain.  And the baby is kicking a lot now, but that's fun.  I think I've moved on from stressing about all the stuff to how are we going to keep up with the kids' activity schedule with a toddler and a newborn.  Everyone always says the younger ones just come along for the ride, which they will, but the mental energy just to get everyone out the door and to figure out when the baby will eat (can't happen while I'm driving!) is what seems overwhelming at this point.  I remember what it was like with Levi and I didn't have a toddler and it was summer so it was a little slower.  This time it will be baseball season for crying aloud!  Even without a newborn I usually tell people, talk to me in June because of the craziness.  Just going to have to let some things go I suppose.  I think the hard thing with having a big family though is that some of the things that I may have to let go are for the kids or are watching the kids do stuff like play baseball, which is one of my greatest joys in parenting.  But feeding a newborn/baby brings me great joy too and I want it all because these kids are going to be grown up before we know it (did I mention Dylan will need braces before the end of the year?)  But I guess I can't get worked up about missing a game here and there or not being there for everything.  Maybe I thought when I quit work that I wouldn't have to make those hard decisions anymore but anyone with more than one kid or a job has to so this shouldn't be so surprising.      

Lydia's 8-year update

Our baby girl is growing up!  Eight is a big year - legally, Lydia doesn't have to ride in a car seat anymore, (but we still do until our kids reach a certain height) and legally, Lydia can be left at home by herself for a short time period, (we have done this very limitedly).  Milestones this past year include going to camp by herself for the first time (Mommy and Dylan were also there but not in the same cabin), riding the big roller coasters at Kings Dominion (she and Dylan went on one by themselves that went upside down), playing in her first piano recital, playing on a softball team, joining the swim team, and moving up to the "big kids' choir" at church.  The above picture was taken before the Christmas concert that Lydia sang in.

Lydia is still the child that talks back the least and is super loving and so joyful to be around almost all the time.  She's always ready for a hug, wants to spend time with her family, and enjoys most everything we do.  Lydia has become even more comfortable talking to adults this year.

Lydia still loves penguins and my Little Pony and also Pokemon and Under Armour clothes like her big brother.  Lydia also likes ice skating and has been taking lessons continuously since September (although I think we are taking a break after spring break).  She got her second pair of ice skates for her birthday this year.  

We asked Lydia what she wanted to do for her birthday.  She said she wanted to go to the beach (she knew we would be in FL around her birthday) and wanted to go out to eat.  (Have I mentioned she's our easiest child?)  We went to the beach and had a fun day and then ordered out for pizza and bought Lydia the biggest cupcake she had ever seen (look at her face above!).  

Lydia doesn't always match her clothes exactly but she knows what she wants to wear.  Socks and crocs (while riding a croc!) and rain or snow boots on any day of week are some of her current styles.

Her one other request for her birthday this year was for a peanut butter pie (just like Daddy likes).

Lydia is doing great at school, meeting the new challenges that 2nd grade and Form 2 bring - homework every night.  She gets along with everyone at school and church and made new friends at camp at in choir.  She still sucks her thumb but mostly just nights and at church.  Lydia is very excited to be becoming a big sister to a baby girl soon (and to getting her own room.)